If you read this. . .

I'm sorry.

I never meant to hurt you or make you cry.

You could ask me a millions times but I'm still not sure why.

Getting things to a straight line.

Facing the facts of your mistakes, wrong do-ings, and even some lies is not just a tough thing to do but you have to gain the courage to admit to yourself that you have done wrong.  No one else is at fault. No one else to blame.  No fingers can be pointed.

The fact is, none of your mistakes will ever go away.  You simply have to fix them.  That much I've learned.  That much I have swallowed and carried in my backpack through time.  Time, that's another part of this process.  Time is the only thing that will straighten out that jagged line.  You have to take the first step and then it's all time, baby.  Ugh, this blog is rough.  This is not saying anything direct at all.  I guess I still have a lot to learn and overcome.  Man, this isn't easy. 

I'm holding up my glass now.  To the first steps, and continual steps after that.  Cheers.

lines of communication

Communication-
college def.--a process of transferring information from one entity to another. Processes which are nonverbal and verbally mediated interactions between at least two agents which share a repertoire of signs and semiotic rules.
real life def.--something that holds all forms of relationships together.  If it is lost at any moments a gap can be formed causing distress, unhappiness, confusion, and often the end of something true and real.

Today, I saw a viewpoint of communication through a 40yr old unhappily married man.  The sadness in his face and the glass look in his eyes told the real life definition of the word.  The phrase in which is souly responsible for his confusion and loss.

Today, I saw a small viewpoint of a 20yr old just like myself who hasn't quite developed a full personal definition for the word but most definitely knew what it wasn't.

Today, the silver lining. . . amongst the hardship of my own miscommunicated life, knowing the value of communication whether it is strong or weak, it must be present or all else fails.

Tree line

Our first Christmas tree extravaganza!  

Fun times in the Pines!

Success!  

War of my Life

Silver linings are extremly difficult to find in a time where most are thankful they are surrounded by family.  That being said, I found a song.  It's lyrics hit me so deep and I am entiernally thankful for music.  It's a musical staff line that brings me to my knees in tears of saddness and joy.  Here's to music. 

I've got a hammer



And a heart of glass


I got to know right now


Which walls to smash

It's something that most people understand by only some will be touched in the deepest part of their hearts.  To them, I'm with you.

Rhythmic Line

 Play the music low and sway to the rhythm of love.

Ocean Line

Today I managed to screw up dinner, sealing the windows for winter, finding a new pair of jeans, deciding on a black pair of sneakers for work, and probably all sorts of little things. Today, I wasn't going to blog, that's for sure.  But in the midst of all my insanity and my own self pity, a movie presented itself that shed light upon my dreary day of dead ends.  Disney's disneynature movie called "Oceans".  I love the ocean. The fish. The whales. The preditors.  The undiscovered. The over discovered. The exstinct. The endangered. The evolving.  The entire ocean has my heart.  I give money to ocean projects and charities whenever possible and I am a proud contributor to Fish Magazine which supports and helps sustain fish habitats in Indonesia.  Regardless, the ocean, once again, made my line very clear.  See the movie.  Rent it. Buy it. Love it. Cherish it. Share it with others.  You won't regret it. The ocean will thank you.